the black cross of a ship
by Batdz Angel
Summary: This is a port. Here I love you. Turrow, SLASH


**Title:** _the black cross of a ship  
_**Disclaimer:** I don't own Pirates of the Caribbean. If I did, I wouldn't be writing this. I also don't own the line quoted in the title or the summary. They are by the incredible Pablo Neruda.  
**Rating:** PG-13 for mentions of same sex relationships.  
**Pairing(s)/Character(s):** Will POV, Jack/Will, mentions of Will/Elizabeth.  
**Spoilers:** All of CotB and DMC.  
**Genre:** Angst/Romance  
**Summary:** _This is a port. Here I love you.  
_**Author's Notes:** Some more Turrow for those of you who enjoy that pairing!

--

_Here I love you and the horizon hides you in vain.  
__I love you still among these cold things.  
__Sometimes my kisses go on these heavy vessels  
__that cross the sea towards no arrival.  
__I see myself forgotten like those old anchors.  
__The piers sadden when the afternoon moors there.  
__My life grows tired, hungry to no purpose.  
__I love what I do not have. You are so far._

_My loathing wrestles with the slow twilights.  
__But night comes and starts to sing to me.  
__The moon turns its clockwork dream.  
__The biggest stars look at me with your eyes.  
__And as I love you, the pines in the wind  
__want to sing your name with their leaves of wire. XVIII, Pablo Neruda_

When he had first decided to become this, he had done it for the adrenaline rush. He had taken the coin and left behind his old life. Left behind what hadn't been a life at all. He'd slipped out after freeing Jack, leaving nothing to connect him to where he was going.

He had traveled the world, far and wide; he'd spent time in Singapore and Mongolia. He had traveled to Japan and China, learning the art of mediation and other such things that he had never imagined.

He had learned of women and their nature. Sometimes, in the dark nights, he would remember Elizabeth but as time went on she became nothing other than a faint memory. He had realized one morning that he could not recall the sound of her voice nor the color of her eyes nor the touch of her lips against his own.

He learned to love without any fears; his first companion was a young woman by the name of Bess, with fair hair and dark eyes that glittered with glee whenever she discovered something new. She had been a simple girl from a small island town and he had loved her for as long as she had lived, which had been a mere year. A blink of his eyes and she was gone, dead by an illness that left her pale and wain, a shadow of herself.

His second companion was a man by the name of Gabriel. He had been an Irishman with bright green eyes and red hair that was a burnished gold in the morning light. He had drowned during a shipping job, fallen overboard during a small storm.

He had mourned but learned to move on.

Time stopped for no one, less of all an immortal.

He began to learn that what Barbossa had said was true; food became ash in his mouth after only two years and the touch of women nor men did not satisfy him. He began to forget the taste of chocolate, of clean water, of simple things that made life worth living.

Two years of immortality and he stood once again in Port Royal. The small town he had called home was no longer quite so small and he wandered until he found a respectable inn. He paid for a room and went upstairs, pausing long enough to scan the crowd in the bar for any familiar faces. Seeing none, he continued on his path and entered his room, preparing for his journey to the past life he had left behind.

His stay in Port Royal proved fruitful; he learned of the bounty on his head and the one on Elizabeth's. How there had been scandal upon her vanishing via help from her father. He sat in the darker, more dingy pubs and learned of Jack Sparrow's fate at the hands of Davy Jones.

He walked along the edges of the ocean at the news of Jack's death. He walked and listened to the water, and smiled as he realized that the pirate captain wasn't dead, not at all.

He would know it in his soul if he was.

So, he left Port Royal once again and set sail for where he knew there to be someone who could help him figure out where Jack was.He traveled past Tortuga, pausing only long enough to see if there was any word about Jack and as there was none, he continued.

The bayou was dark and damp; the fog and mist curled around his body as if it were a living entity. He paused as he saw the lit up hut and turned his head to look at his guide. The guide merely bowed his head and stepped back as a figure blocked the doorway. He stepped off the small boat and onto the deck. The shadows within the hut shifted and he smiled as he said formally, "I heard that you know of Jack Sparrow."

The woman grinned, revealing black and jagged teeth. "Dat depends on who be askin'."

"I am but a humble blacksmith," Will replied mockingly as he stepped closer to the woman. "My trade is not much but I am not fearful."

"Ye 'ave a touch o' destiny 'bout you," the woman retorted as she beckoned him forward. "Just like ol' Jack, Will'um Turner."

"Do I know you?" he queried as he entered the hut. The woman chuckled softly as she said, "You want to know me. Me name is Tia Dalma. Ye know the rest o' these people."

Will turned, bemusement flickering over his features as he took in the motley crew of familiar faces; Gibbs and Cotton, whom he hadn't seen since breaking Jack free of the noose; Pintel and Ragetti, who he had assumed to have been hung...

Elizabeth Swann and James Norrington.

"Elizabeth," he said feeling a prickle of surprise. "Commodore." Sarcasm lined his greeting and he smirked as Norrington snorted, looking away. Will had heard of the former Navy commander's fate after chasing Jack through a storm and felt not need to offer respect to a man who hadn't given ever graced him any.

The pair stared at him, Elizabeth's mouth agape with shock. She mouthed his name and then stepped forward as if intending to reach out to him. Something stopped her though, perhaps the look in his eyes, the lack of care he gave as he looked at Norrington and said, "I heard of your misfortune."

A tight smile pulled at Will's mouth as he added, "I shall not say I'm sorry to hear of your reward for chasing after a futile dream."

"Will!" Elizabeth gasped but Norrington chuckled as he said coldly, "I'm afraid I'm merely a commoner now as you are, Turner."

"Well, I prefer commoners and pirates," Will replied. "They tend to be more honest than those of high society." Ignoring the horrified look on Elizabeth's face, Will turned to Tia Dalma and said, "What has happened to Jack? Who killed him?"

Tia Dalma's eyes flickered away from him briefly and she said vaguely, "All will be reveal'd Will'um Turner. But first, I ask ye: are ye prepared to bring ol' Jack back? What will ye give?"

"Whatever is needed," Will answered honestly. "Jack was a good man. A dishonest man but a good man nonetheless. I wish to see to him again."

"Ye are prepared to make a great sacrifice?" Tia Dalma asked as she circled him. "Ye will bring 'im back even if ye see someone ye dearly loved? Can ye make dat kind o' sacrifice?"

Will thought of Bess, of Gabriel. Remembered how they had both always said his mind seemed far away some nights. How he hadn't been so in love with them that he would forget the man who had captured his soul.

"Yes," he said finally as he met Tia's gaze. "I can."

Tia grinned. "Good."

And when he saw Barbossa, grinning and as alive as he was, Will knew that this journey would test all he had learned in the past two years.

--

It is almost comical, how nothing has really changed for these people. They assume he is still the same naive and noble blacksmith he was before, and Will delights in educating them that he is not. The first half of this is when someone takes note of the gold chain around his neck.

"What's that bauble then?" comes the query and Will calmly removes the chain from his neck, revealing not only the Spanish gold but the two rings that he had given his two dead lovers. Elizabeth had gasped in horror at the sight of the medallion and Norrington had asked mildly, "I take it you were married for a time, Turner?"

Will smiled tightly. "I was," he admitted. "To a wonderful woman and a wonderful man."

The look of shock on Elizabeth's face almost makes him laugh. Despite her assumptions that she was educated, the reality of the world would shock her young and innocent mind. He supposed it was why she had believed that pirates were fascinating and not as deadly as they were.

Barbossa's eyes gleam as he says, "Have you gotten a taste for sodomy then, young Turner?"

Will offered him a smirk. "I wouldn't say that. I would say that I learned to love people regardless of what society thinks and what others would prefer of me."

The old pirate laughed out loud and resume his task of manning the helm. Jack the monkey screeched at him in what Will assumed was anger and the former blacksmith narrowed his eyes at it threateningly. The monkey screeched again but fled over to its master, chittering at him in a manner that made Barbossa almost smile.

The second half of making everyone understand he is not the same is when Elizabeth approached him on day five of the voyage; the knowledge of Will taking part in an abnormal relationship had frightened her at first but she had finally decided to take a leap and talk to him.

"Where have you been?" she asked first thing and Will laughed softly to himself as he waved a hand in the air, motioning towards the ocean. He shrugged and said, "The world. I have traveled quite far."

"You disappeared," Elizabeth murmured and Will turned his head to look at her. She was beautiful in a way that reminded him of the beautiful women he had seen in Europe. The problem was that she knew of her beauty and Will was certain that she put more stock into that part of herself than her intelligence.

"I did," he confirmed as he leaned against the railing, watching the ocean carry them towards their destination. Beneath them he knew traveled creatures that no one could imagine and yet he suspected Elizabeth knew what was beneath the sea better than anyone.

Elizabeth stared at him and said, voice sad, "You left me." She looked down at the wood beneath their feet, asking softly, "Did you love me?"

The desperation in her tone made him wince inwardly but he said softly, "No, Elizabeth. I was infatuated with you. But I did not love you."

The grief on her face made him want to ease her pain and he sighed. "My choice to leave had nothing to do with you," he informed her quite firmly. "Believe me when I tell you that I am not the man for you."

"I still love you Will," she said desperately, reaching out and grabbing his hands tightly. "I haven't stopped loving you!"

Will sighed and cupped her face, allowing hope to bloom within her breast briefly but his words shattered that hope as quickly as his actions had caused it. "My life," he explained gently. "Wasn't truly a _life_, Elizabeth. I am grateful for all you and your father did for me. For taking me in when no one else would; for providing me with a trade and a skill. But I was slowly eroding away in Port Royal. I was playing a part."

A tear slipped down her cheek. "I love you, Will," she whispered. "I can't stop loving you."

"You love who you _think_ I am," he corrected her gently. "But I am not that romantic hero in your head. I am a mere man, Elizabeth. A man who makes mistakes and doesn't do noble things without hesitating first." Will dropped his hands. "You _will _find your true love, Elizabeth, believe me. It is just not me."

Tears slipped Elizabeth's face and she turned, fleeing away from him. Will watched her go and thought that life didn't get easier even when one was immortal.

--

Will settled himself down in his hammock, sighing deeply as the day's events took its toll on him. He closed his eyes, hoping to fall asleep and yet something nagged at him. He had on his time aboard the commandeered ship learned of the events leading up to Jack's demise, including the connection between the Kraken and Davy Jones. But something didn't seem to connect between Jack staying aboard _the Pearl_ and the rest of the crew managing to flee to safety.

Someone entered and he opened his eyes to watch Norrington enter the room, looking disgruntled. Stretching, Will queried, "Is something bothering you Commodore?"

The other man shot him a nasty glare and said tersely, "Actually, you are bothering me, Turner. How dare you break poor Elizabeth's heart and then expect her to deal with it!"

Arching his brows at the fury written in his voice, Will rose up from the hammock and said calmly, "And what would you want me to do? Promise her that I will love her when I cannot? Promise something that I don't feel? I cannot do that to her, Norrington. It would not be fair."

"Fair?!" the older man thundered as he stepped forward. "Do you have _any_ idea what that girl has gone through in the last two years? She has been kidnapped, humiliated by you, shot at by pirates, forced to run away from the Crown, and had to do the most horrendous thing to save herself!"

Something clicked in Will's mind. He had mulled over why Jack would stay on _the Pearl_, why his basic sense of self-preservation would fail that way. He inhaled slowly through his nostrils and said, voice deadly calm, "What did Elizabeth do, Norrington?"

Norrington didn't answer him, merely dropped his eyes to the ground. Will took a step forward, raising his voice and said, "You were so _bloody_ furious before. What is stopping you? Really, _mate_, what could be so horrible?"

"What is all the yelling for?" Elizabeth asked as she peered into the room. "James? Will?"

Both men stared at one another and James said, voice quiet, "I saw you with Jack, Elizabeth."

Will watched as Elizabeth's eyes widened and she darted a glance at him as she whispered, "Oh." The girl swallowed and said quietly, "It wasn't what you think, James. I kissed him yes but that's all it was. A kiss."

"When?" Will demanded suddenly and Elizabeth dropped her eyes to the floor as she said, "Before the Kraken attacked again. We had managed to hurt it and James was busy helping the others off the ship while Jack and I spoke. I knew that the Kraken would return for him because of the black spot on his hand."

She took a deep, shaky breath. "So I distracted him, kissed him. Then I cuffed him to the mast."

Bile rose in Will's throat as he stared at the girl before him. He could picture Jack helpless against the creature and she had put him there. Closing his eyes, he turned and rubbed a hand over his face as James said quietly, "Elizabeth, why...?"

"I did it to save us!" she implored him. "You of all people must understand. James, you were there, you saw Jack abandon us once. I could not allow him to do that again!"

Will shook his head, laughing as he spun to face them. "You're both _bloody fools_," he said angrily. "Jack Sparrow may have been a pirate. He may have been dishonest and self-serving but the one thing he has never been is a coward."

He picked up his sword and coat, pulling them on as he strode past them. "And if either of you believe to the contrary," he said as he paused in the doorway. "Then you are both the most callous, self-centered people on the whole damn planet."

Then, he left the pair to face one another and their own sins. He had enough of his own to deal with.

--

"Bloody pirates," Will grunted as he heaved himself over the edge of the _Flying Dutchman._

The final confrontation between Davy Jones and the remaining allies of Jack Sparrow had been brutal. At one point, Barbossa had turned against them and Will had been the one to end the other immortal's sorry existence. Obviously cutting the head off of anything solved the problem and Barbossa was no exception.

He looked around at the ship, remembering how Davy Jones had ordered his damned crew to keep them away from the bowels of it. So, the immortal headed down into the depths of the ship, searching for his wayward friend. He came upon a locked door and after looking around, shrugged, turned and came running back down the hallway full tilt.

The door broke easily from the impact and he stumbled in, swearing as he skidded to a stop. The room was pitch black and stank of sweat and a metallic smell that made his nose wrinkle. He realized it was the scent of dried blood and swore as he looked around for a light.

Finding nothing, he cursed again and finally lifted a piece of broken door from the ground. Ripping the arm of his shirt, he wrapped the cloth around the wood and poured the rum he had stolen from Gibbs onto the cloth. Rummaging in his pockets, he came up with a single match and was fortunate enough to light it with one stroke.

The newly made torch burned brightly and Will realized that the room was really a landing; he had been fortunate in that he hadn't pitched over the edge. He made his way down the stairs gingerly and called softly, "Jack?"

The sound of something moving in the shadows had Will placing his hand on the hilt of his sword. He walked slowly, calling for the pirate as he moved deeper within the room. He paused as he heard harsh breathing and called, "Jack?"

Silence.

"Jack?" he said again. "Jack, it's me. Will Turner. Please, Jack, we must get out of here..."

His foot bumped against something and Will angled the torch, swearing as he realized that he had actually tripped over Jack's inert form. Dropping down, Will touched the figure on the ground with his free hand and the body shuddered, skittering away from him in a manner that made him feel ill.

"Jack?" Will repeated, allowing his voice to be soft and soothing. "Jack, do you not remember me? It's Will Turner. Bootstrap's son."

The body curled in on itself and Will swore to himself as he rose to his feet. He looked around the dank room and muttered, "Damn it..." as he realized that Jack was immobilized by the chains around his ankles. No wonder he was crawling around like a crab, he noted, he couldn't get up and walk.

Taking a deep breath, he said, "Jack, I'll be back, I promise. I need to find the key for those chains, Jack."

Something shuddered through the body and Will watched as a bony hand pointed towards a wall. He frowned and moved closer, angling his torch and narrowing his eyes as he saw the key hanging along the wall. Swearing loudly, he muttered, "Jones had better not run into me or I swear to bloody Christ I'll slice off his tentacles one by one..." as he went about freeing Jack from his manacles.

He stripped himself of his shirt, covering Jack's emaciated form with the cloth. The pirate captain shuddered as Will led him out into the open air and hid his face against Will's chest as he trembled from fright. Will took a deep breath and realizing that Jack wouldn't be able to walk all the way towards the edge the ship and then onto their ship, picked Jack up as if he weighed no more than a feather.

Jack's hands curled themselves into Will's hair and the pirate captain knew nothing more.

--

Jack slept in fits and turns, Will watching over him silently as Tia Dalma moved within the cabin. She lit candles and incense, the heavy smell of perfume hanging in the air as she murmured to herself in a language he could not understand. The pirate captain jerked in his sleep, his eyelids fluttering as he slept.

"He must dream," Tia Dalma informed Will quietly as she gathered together some blankets. "It will purge all dat negative energy."

"Jones won't stop, will he?" Will asked her as he watched Jack sleep, his eyes watching the pirate's restless slumber. "He won't stop until Jack's dead or worse."

"I don't tink ye'll have to worry about Davy Jones no more Will'um Turner," the witch replied, her eyes glinting. "I shall take care o' him."

"What?" Will spun but she was already gone, the door swinging shut. He paused uncertainly but was distracted by Jack's sudden whisper of his name. He turned to look at the pirate who mumbled again, louder, his voice cracking as he struggled against the sheets.

"No, don't...leave him...don't touch Will..."

"Jack?" Will whispered gently as he touched the other man's hand but the pirate captain merely sighed and sank deeper into slumber. The immortal closed his eyes tightly as exhaustion crept upon him, the perfume in the air making him dizzy and soon he slept as well.

Unnoticed, Elizabeth poked her head into the room and gasped as she saw Will's head pillow upon Jack's stomach. The pirate captain's hand was clasped tightly in Will's hand, and the two men seemed peaceful even in sleep. Tears filled the girl's eyes but she merely stifled a sob and fled from the door.

--

_Will frowned as he looked around the room; it was lavishly decorated with fabrics and other furniture that he recognized as Jack's preference when he had been captain of the Black Pearl. He stepped forward and called, "Hello? Is anyone there?"_

_A moan came from behind him and Will spun, his eyes widening as he stared at the figure before him._

_It was Jack._

_Jack, bound and chained as he had been aboard the Flying Dutchman. His body was changing into that of a sea creature; Will winced as he realized that Jack was bleeding from his wrists and ankles..._

"_Jack?" he said rushing over to his side. "Jack, what are you doing? You're free."_

"_S'all a dream," the pirate rasped. "You're not really here, luv."_

_Will's eyes widened. "I saved you!" he insisted. "I did! I carried you off that damned ship myself! Jack, you must believe me!"_

"_S'all lies," the pirate captain mumbled as he shut his eyes. "All o' it..."_

_The air around them seemed to change, growing darker, thicker. Will watched in horror as Davy Jones manifested before him and the pirate captain, tentacles wriggling as he sneered down at Jack. The pirate merely shut his eyes tighter and Will cried out as a whip rang through the air, scarring Jack's back._

"_No!" he shouted rushing forward and the apparition that looked like Jones gasped, looking down to where a knife was embedded into his chest. He staggered back and vanished into nothing. Will turned and marched over to Jack, saying sharply, "That's it Jack Sparrow! You look at me right now or-"_

"-I'll bloody make you!"

Will sat straight up, gasping as his head swam. The immortal blinked a few times in confusion and then looked down at the prone form before him. A frown crossed his face and he murmured, "Right then..." before standing up, bracing his arms over the pirate captain's head and saying sharply, "I know you can hear me Jack Sparrow, so listen: I am _not_ putting up with this bloody foolishness. I risked my bloody life to save your scrawny self and you _will_ wake up and thank me for it!"

Nothing. Not even a twitch.

"Do you hear me?" Will demanded. "Damn it Jack Sparrow, if you don't wake up right now-"

"What are you doing?" Elizabeth gaped at him from the doorway, a tray in her hand. Will ignored her and said fiercely, "Jack Sparrow, I command you to wake up, you bloody pirate!"

Elizabeth's eyebrows arched as her former fiancé proceeded to shout every swear word and insult he could think of at the prone pirate. She started as James appeared at her side, the look on his face telling her that he thought Will had gone completely mad as he insulted the comatose figure on the bed.

"And another thing," Will continued ignoring his audience. "If you bloody think I'm going to coddle you, you have another thing coming Jack Sparrow because as far as I'm concerned, you're nothing but a lying, cheating pirate!" He panted and glared down at the pirate beneath him. "Well," he challenged, his eyebrow arched. "What do you say to that?"

James and Elizabeth exchanged glances.

"Captain," came the weak but clear correction. "_Captain_ Jack Sparrow."

That was all Will needed to hear before he sank back into his chair with a broad smile. "It's about bloody time, you bastard," he said wearily and laughed.

--

They had left James and Elizabeth at port town about four days sail from Port Royale; the pair hadn't felt the need to accompany Jack and Will on their journey to the Isla de Muerte. Then again, neither Jack or Will hadn't asked either of them to come and Jack's obvious discomfort around them both decided their actions for them.

The pirate captain was recuperating slowly, much slower than he liked, which he showed in his complaints and whines to anyone who would listen. Will was the only one who could seem to shut Jack up and keep him content but that was more than likely because the immortal had no problems telling the pirate to "shut the bloody hell up!"

They came upon the Isla de Muerte within a few days of leaving Elizabeth and James behind. Jack insisted on coming onto the island and nothing Will said would dissuade him; so the pair got into a boat, Will rowing towards the island while the crew watched from the ship. A few whispered prayers for the pair while Gibbs swallowed a mouthful of rum and paced the deck nervously.

Meanwhile, within the cave, Jack slapped at Will's hand irritably as he dismounted from the boat. "I can bloody well walk, young Turner," he said gruffly and Will held up his hands in surrender as they entered the cave, the light from their lantern allowing them to see the glitter of the gold and treasure. He had managed to get Barbossa's medallion as well and had covered it in the old pirate's blood. The monkey had vanished, where no one knew but Will had suspected that the creature was as dead as its master now.

"Are you certain of this?" Jack asked him as they stood before the chest. Will sliced into his palm, the twinge along his nerve endings telling him he had cut deep enough and coated the coin in his blood. He tossed both coins into the chest and the pair jumped back in surprise as the lid slammed shut without any help.

Jack and Will stared at one another. "Yes," Will said with a shaky sigh. "I am."

"And what of your plan?" Jack queried as they began to make their way back to the boat. "Of having a real life? An adventure?"

Will smiled as he turned to look at the pirate. "I think I'll be fine without any of that," he said truthfully. "As long as I have you."

--

It was about a year after giving up his immortality that Will sat down at the desk in the captain's quarters aboard the ship. He rummaged around and finally found a clean sheet of stationary and an envelope. Carefully, Will began to write.

_Dear Elizabeth,_ he wrote his fingers carefully working the pen, _I hope this letter finds you well and that you are no longer disappointed with me. I hope that you have found that what I said to you is true; I am not the man for you. I have never been the man that you thought I was. _

_Things are going quite well for me; I gave up my immortality and have realized that I didn't need it to be happy. Living with Jack and the crew has shown me that every day is an adventure, and that my life is fuller than I had ever dreamed it could be._

_Speaking of, Jack is doing quite well. His recovery rate is rather remarkable but then again he is Jack Sparrow so who am I to judge? He is once more that same pirate we first met but with a bit more maturity to his character. I do enjoy his company more than I had ever thought I would._

_As for the Pearl, she has been recovered. It was a slow and difficult process but with the help of Tia Dalma and other characters that Jack knows, we managed to find the majority of her pieces and save her from death yet again. She seems to have forgiven me for allowing her captain to face death alone and Jack's pleased as ever to have his Pearlie back._

_I must tell you that I shall not write again Elizabeth. Mostly because I do not wish to cause you anymore pain. I am truly saddened that you and I were not meant to be more than friends but I urge you to keep an open heart. Love is sometimes where you least expect to find it._

_I am happy Elizabeth. My life is now what I had wished for it to be and my place is now at Jack's side. I suspect it has always been at his side, before I even knew it or him. Goodbye Miss Swann; it has been an honor to know you._

_Yours in friendship,_

_William Turner_

"Are you done, whelp?" Jack asked from where he stood in the doorway. Will looked over at his pirate captain and smiled. "For now," he agreed as he folded the letter up and placed it within the envelope. Jack made his way over and said, "Here..." as he took the letter and carefully poured wax over it, sealing it with a stamp that held an etching of the _Black Pearl_.

--

The missive arrived weeks later; Will tore open the heavy, cream-colored paper and read the reply. Wordlessly, he handed it to Jack, who glanced at it and then folded it back up and placed it within a box inside of the desk. Then, he pulled Will towards him and murmured, "That's the end of it then?"

Will smiled and nodded. "Yes," he said.

And lying within the desk, to be forgotten as time went on, sat the single piece of paper. Written in feminine hand were two simple words with no name, no greeting.

_Thank you_, it read and really what else was there left to say?

**FIN**


End file.
